I've clearly gone insane if I'm addressing gnats.

[ghostdrive]

Dear Gnats,

Come near my soda again and I'll crush you under my thumb (or whatever digit I find handy). I know I tend to do the catch-and-release thing when it comes to ladybugs, but you, my friends, are far too annoying for such sympathy.

Please take heed of your poor, dead, little friend who is currently lying at the bottom of a plastic cup. He decided to tread into my territory and paid the consequences. Do you want to end up like him? ...I didn't think so.

Sincerely,
Kathy, Gnat Killer Extraordinaire

------

EDIT: I want Brain Age.

Comments

[raknarok.livejournal.com]

I know the feeling of gnats, so I bought a Venus Fly Trap, which worked kinda....then they stopped doing their job and now I have 6 plants to feed>

[ghostdrive.livejournal.com]

We used to stick fly paper around the house when the gnats were really bothering us. Unfortunately it had two downsides: 1. If the house got too hot, the sticky goo on the paper would start dripping (and it took FOREVER to peel off the floor/carpet) and 2. I constantly worried my cats would somehow get stuck on one. XD Ahahaha, I'm now laughing at the image of one of my cats walking around with fly paper on them.

But Venus fly traps! I haven't had one of those since 4th grade! My class had one as a class pet (WTF! Weird) and I used to stare at it during break periods since I thought it was the coolest thing ever.